Month: May 2017

Tehillim Sixty-Two: Faith

Posted on by Samantha

“Only He is my Rock and my salvation; my stronghold, I shall not falter (Psalms 62:7).” I like this verse because it seems like a classic expression of devout faith. So often, people who I know who don’t identify as Orthodox (myself included) feel the need to couch their beliefs in some way. It’s awkward to talk about faith in God when you’re not ‘religious’ and it’s definitely not something that regularly comes up. You end up speaking in hypotheticals and non-declarative statements a lot of the time, which takes a toll when it comes to authenticity. I’m proud of my beliefs, and I do a lot of internal work on figuring out how my insides match up with my outward expressions. So how can I be stronger in expressing that?

Tehillim Sixty-One: Tent

Posted on by Samantha

“I shall dwell in Your tent to eternity; I will take shelter in the covert of Your wings forever (Psalms 61:5).” In the Jewish community, we spend a lot of time talking about the tent. Who is welcome within it, who has ownership of it, how wide can it be? Being in the tent is akin to being part of the community, and those who are outside of the tent are somehow removed from the inner circle. That’s why there are so many conversations about making sure our metaphorical tent is open, and inclusive. We’re only as diverse as those who we let in, and therefore only as strong as the edges of our tent. The metaphor can be taken further – what are the tent pegs that serve as the foundations of our community? Where is our tent? Do we have walls?

Tehillim Sixty: Flashback

Posted on by Samantha

This chapter is full of references to events in previous books. It opens with a flashback to King David as a warrior. “When he fought with Aram-Nahariam and with Aram-Zobah, and Joab returned and smote twelve thousand of Edom in the alley of salt (Psalms 60:2).” Slightly embarrassingly, while I remember Joab, the battles being references here – not so much. If I did read about them back in Nevi’im, they’re part of the sadly long list of things I’ve already forgotten from this project. I guess that’s why you’re supposed to read this text over and over again – each time absorbing new, and bringing something different of yourself.

Tehillim Fifty-Nine: Kindness

Posted on by Samantha

“My strength! To You will I sing for God is my stronghold, O God of my kindness (Psalms 59:18).” I’d like to focus on the latter part of this verse, the ‘God of my kindness’ component. I’m trying to be more mindful about being kind in an active sense lately. Obviously I’ve always tried to be kind, as I hope everyone does, but it’s become more intentional lately. Every day, I aim to pick one person to bring a bit of light to. I believe that each of us has a unique light that we bring to the world, and I want to share that with others.

Tehillim Fifty-Eight: Righteousness

Posted on by Samantha

“The righteous man will rejoice because he saw revenge; he will bathe his feet in the blood of the wicked (Psalms 58:11).” This sentence goes against most of my understanding of what it means to be righteous. I often think about how it would make me a better person if I didn’t take pleasure from the minor problems of people who’ve done bad things or who I don’t like. And that’s just moderate. How can it be a good thing to rejoice in the problems of others, no matter how wicked they are? Aren’t we supposed to hope for their redemption and only wish good things?

Tehillim Fifty-Seven: Glory

Posted on by Samantha

In this chapter, it wasn’t a full verse that drew me in, but a specific word. “Be exalted above the heavens, O God, over all the earth be Your glory (Psalms 57:12).” The word that stood out to me here is glory. It’s one that I spoke about a lot over the weekend, so it seemed like a happy coincidence that it popped up in this week’s reading. We were discussing what glory is, and when one has had a moment of glory. It seems like such a powerful word – it brings to mind images of splendor, power, success, renown. It can be taken as a definite positive, or an intimidating negative. I was trying to think of moments of glory that I’ve experienced, and I don’t know what they’ve been. My wedding was a moment of splendor, but not necessarily a powerful one. I’ve felt some kind of glory when I’m fully in my element – teaching, giving of myself to others. But a complete sensation has eluded me thus far. Have you experienced glory?

Tehillim Fifty-Six: Sticks and Stones

Posted on by Samantha

“In God I trusted, I will not fear. What can man do to me (Psalms 56:12)?” To me, this verse alludes to the classic childhood mantra of sticks and stones may break my bones but words will never hurt me. Both of these phrases are comforting in a simplistic sense, but when it comes to reality don’t necessarily hold up. With or without confidence in God, people can hurt others, as history has repeatedly shown, and particularly in the age of the internet and social media, we know words can be equally or more hurtful than any physical ailment. Does faith get us through these adversities more whole and happy than we would have been otherwise? Is that what the psalmist is telling us? While a person of faith hopefully won’t be shaken by the acts of hatred of others, human beings have a tragic capacity to harm their peers, and today, as in every age, there are innumerable reasons to fear our fellow humans. It’s a sad reality that some people are out to do us harm, to hurt us, and to damage us, physically and with words. I’m not sure how faith plays into that, and how it necessarily helps, but I hope that for those who are suffering, they’re able to find at least some level of comfort.

Tehillim Fifty-Five: Wandering

Posted on by Samantha

The context of this chapter is that the psalmist is being pursued and threatened by an enemy, and is seeking God’s help, protection, and comfort. I recognize that I’m therefore taking the verse that appealed to me out of its context as part of a desire to escape the enemy, but the verse stood so well on its own that I wanted to make note of it. “Behold I would wander far away; I would lodge in the desert forever (Psalms 55:8).” There’s a beautiful imagery in this verse, particularly as it invokes the desert as the place where the narrator would escape to if given the chance. Wandering evokes some interesting pictures and emotions. Is wandering movement without a plan? Or is it more deliberate, with goals other than a destination or straight path in mind? I’m sure each of us has a different and unique ‘happy place’ that we’d go to, either physically or in our minds and hearts, if given the chance. The desert isn’t mine – I’m more of a mountains and water kind of girl – but I can appreciate the stark, lonely beauty that it also brings. The desert is where the Jewish people and nation were forged, so I can’t blame the psalmist for wanting to go back to it as a place where transformation happens.

Tehillim Fifty-Four: Prayer

Posted on by Samantha

Prayer is something that I usually connect with through the rote nature of it. I like singing the melodies, hearing my voice and those of the others in my community mix together in an ancient cry to the divine. I love feeling connected to the generations that have come before me and said these words, and knowing that anywhere I go for the rest of my life, if I find a synagogue, there’ll be a familiarity through prayer. I’ve never felt a real need to go beyond the siddur and the traditional liturgy. But this weekend, I was on a wonderful, affirming retreat with a women’s group. While we stuck with some of the canonized words, a lot of our spiritual practice for the weekend was about breath, meditation, and introspection. Coming home, I opened my chapter for the day and found this verse. “O God, hearken to my prayer, incline Your ear to the words of my mouth (Psalms 54:4).” This weekend was all about intimacy, and fostering it internally, in our relationships and friendships, and in our spirituality. There’s an intimacy to being in an active listening conversation, where one feels truly heard and understood. If that’s what I can get from a more personalized prayer experience, it’ll be a great takeaway from this moment to bring into my regular life.

Tehillim Fifty-Three: Looking Down

Posted on by Samantha

“God looked down from heaven upon the sons of men to see whether there is a man of understanding, who seeks God (Psalms 53:3).” What’s interesting to me in this verse is the idea of God looking down on humanity, judging our character and capacity to seek and understand Him. While obviously God is in a class by Himself (that goes without saying), in general, this doesn’t seem like a great method. If someone, whoever or whatever they are, looks down from on high and and passes judgment on the perceived morals and values of individuals, their perspectives are inherently skewed. As an educator, if I place myself as an authority above my students, I set us up as ‘other.’ Our relationship is transactional, instead of symbiotic. I can judge them from what I see from the head of the room, without meaningfully interacting with them or seeking to understand their motivations. But in doing so, I won’t get an authentic view of them, or as thoughtful of a portrait, and I would definitely be the one who misses out.